The Deep Depression

Before I start, let me warn you that I have been having some fun with the still image function on my camcorder =3=

I have been feeling very sad recently, which resulted in oceans of tears. Why? I've been feeling exhausted both physically and mentally. Ever since I moved, everyday has been wasted in front of the computer. Priorities have been set aside till the last minute, and I can't sleep until 12'0'clock. Mentally, I've been thinking of nothing but my failures (a poor way to go about things). School has been KILLING me. Without a doubt, I hope that this is just an awful part of my teenage years. Anyhow, I believe that everyone should know how to treat a person who is crying (at least from my perspective).

• PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DON'T ASK THEM WHY THEY ARE CRYING
I won't lie; I'm guilty of asking this all of the time, but acknowledge the fact that this will likely make the person cry MORE. (Hopefully) nobody wants this. By asking, you're forcing the person to essentially RELIVE any tragic situation. If you don't cause them to relive the trauma, you'll probably hurt their ego. How? What if the person was crying due to the fact that they . . . lost a Pokemon battle.. They now have to tell you that they're starting waterworks, because they lost a dork game (no offense); Not cool.

• DON'T ASK "ARE YOU OKAY?" EITHER
If they are CRYING, you can almost guarantee that they are NOT okay; Something is DEFINITELY WRONG. If you can see that they are injured, shoot the question quickly, it shows that you care. Even so, you shouldn't stop there! Follow up by asking if they would like some help. If they are dying, please call 911.
I the person is not physically injured, avoid asking excessive questions. Remember, they are drowning in tears. It's not the best time to interview them.

• IT'S NOT A SHOW
If somebody is crying at a public location (e.g. School), don't CROWD around. Personally, the last thing I want is to have the rest of the world staring at my crying face. Others might want some attention, which I would assume is rare. Not many people would like 30+ people calmly enjoying their agony filled tears. Some people would like to be alone, so they can safely burst with emotion. It's easy to imagine how hard it would be to cry around others, especially strangers.

I'm somebody who personally needs the space.


MOVING ON:
As I may have said, I've been feeling stressed out emotionally. This is due to the fact that my grades are slipping, and I feel as if I am losing my friends. At school, lunch hours are either spent listening to others' conversations, slaving over homework, or alone at the library. Obviously, lunch is no longer the fun filled part of school it used to be. Elementary could be compared to a rainbow, whereas high school seems like nothing more than the dreary gray of a cloudy sky . . . blargh. My "friends", which I see simply as lunch buddies now, seem to all have their own close knit group of friends. I've said this time and time again. The flips have their group, drama lovers sit in pairs, and Suzanna has Stephanie. Me? I sit off to the side, lost. It's Chinese New Years, so I'll try to avoid dwelling on things that have happened in the past, but all I can say is that I've had better days.

Unlike high school, the weather has been beautiful. A delightful gift. My lonely trips to the library have been made enjoyable thanks to the gorgeous sunshine. It would be that much better if I weren't alone. I miss the laughter, and joy I used to share with friends.


Clear of people. I walk the streets tall. I am Queen, but I am not royalty.

Much love,
pk